Kirozey's World of Wonder

That bingo card is looking sad as my art motivation...nothing gettin' done. But you know what I have been doing? Messing around on dating apps. Messing around in a way of; "You're not allowed get mad at me that I spend 90% of my time on Pokefarm. If you don't know what pokefarm is, don't worry about it. If you do...don't find me." Also me is running away when people like me or it says "it's a match!". Like no...Imma go now and turn into a real ghost, bye. "Come find me on pokefarm if you want to talk...wait no-" Really though, I need to do art. I was going to but those updates got me stalking the lab to hatch brown things. I know the next tournament will allow us to grab them freely but, brain says "Do it now." :( Tomorrow. Tomorrow for sure if not after reset. Speed through the adopts and then do all the art I can. Someone ban me, but not kick me, from discord server chat and being able to interact. Betting 500 gold that I won't finish anything or only finish 1 thing. :')

When your friend hasn't spoken to you in 2 weeks, thinking the worse, and then after I told myself to move on and think about something or someone else, here he comes. "How petty are you?" Me: He sent me a message on discord about how his phone didn't show notifications and he was busy/stressed from work and collage stuff. I just: 👍 and went to sleep. When you want to run to hug them through the screen, but also want to ignore them if they suddenly disappear again. "No, I'm over you now. It's okay. You can leave. Bye." Mostly sharing this here to remind myself how much I overreacted and to shame myself. Went through the stages of grief, backwards and forwards. . . . He's not gone, he was busy like I said he was. Now stop wallowing in your own self pity and get back to working on art!

So many images broken because of Discord making them invalid for security reasons. Which with all the accounts being hacked left and right, it's fairly understandable. Also they're not a image host and all. It's just too easy to copy and paste things in there without having to save it to your device to upload it somewhere. I'm sure I'll get around to it eventually. The site counter goals were raised but we're still hitting them somewhat quickly still. I only want them to be harder so I'm not obligated to hatch so much. Ones that don't make me feel like I'm wasting the bonuses as much are scour and gems. They're nice but, they don't effect my hunts since I'm not hunting for gems or boxes right now. Credits and gold, sort of. If I don't have the funds then they mean nothing to me. Exp, interactions and shelter are the ones that jingle the keys for my attention for me to get the adopts done desperately. Shiny...eh. Yes and no. RNG can still be stanky regardless. Is nice when it helps. "Raise exp, interactions and shelter goals again so that I finish my adopts and force myself to properly sleep and get things done. Thank you, bye."

So I've been using Spotify a lot lately. I'm sure when the ads get annoying again I will go back to my youtube playlist. (I'm not using the app for it because then those ads interrupt the music with audio ads other than image ones like I get on desktop) I wanted to add my own music because I can't find some of them or the versions I like. So, I let it have access to my music files... "Whoops?" Some of them seem to be on Spotify already, which is great. I don't know if I will use the desktop app, probably not. But it was fun to mess with. Even though I do no think I listen to all of those. I think a lot of those are kept somewhere for safe keeping. I would put them somewhere else but, storage limitations. Thought about making another google account or something just to have more space for music and other files. Anyways, hi. :')

When you call your friend "Pookie" as a joke but now it feels like he's calling you "Baby Girl" on purpose...I don't want to play this game anymore. This started to feel over that friendzone line again. 🤨 "I'm going to start calling you my husband if you don't stop-" It's always those 3AM chats I swear. Well, 3 for me, 2 for him. ... Wouldn't trade it for the world. My comfort friend for over ten years that I love and hate to have~ 🥴💙 Trying to enjoy it while I can because this year is already horrible for me. So, anyways- ✨These shrimp fresh? 🦐✨ . . . - They just arrive. Straight from the best aqua farm in Night City! Ackwa farm? - Where do you think? Pacifica? That trash from the sea no good, make you sick! (Can you tell I've been watching Vinny V-Saucer play Cyberpunk again?)

Imagine fighting with your friend over the internet about who gets to sleep in the bed first just to lose because he fell asleep. "You cheated because you fell asleep on me, literally and figuratively." We both have a twin sized bed so mine wouldn't be better if we shared it in real life. I'll just drag mine all the way to Oklahoma so we can push them together on the floor. 👌 I guess I'm sleeping on the floor again. I didn't want to sleep next to his stinky self anyways, smh. 😔 (Going to steal his glasses so he can't see when he wakes up. Can't go to work without your glasses, nerd.)

Sometimes you don't know, or realize, how depressed or lonely you really are until someone asks you; "Are you okay?", "What's wrong?" or "What happened?"...or if you even just think about it and you cry anyways. Then you can't even tell them anything because you're in distress from that question like if they just hurt you with it. Then you feel guilty for causing them stress and concern because you can't speak from fighting off the urge to cry in front of everyone. Making you want to run away to leave them alone. Frustrated and embarrassed for myself, all the way back to my room. Mmm...depressing journal post on mother's day. Very Gud™. Now someone rip this page out without telling me, I won't even notice.